All posts tagged: love

Fiction Friday: Full long version of short story “Roadside”

  Hello All- I’m posting this Australian fiction short story in its entirety, so feel free to skip this post if that’s not yer thing obviously. Make a cuppa and spend five minutes with Lucy and Eris, as several readers commented that they’d prefer a longer read, to sink into it, so I decided to post the full story. This piece won tiny accolades in several small writing competitions here, although it’s a few years old now. I hope you enjoy it, and thanks so much for reading. In gratitude for words, G xO    “Roadside”- (c) bone&silver 2018 Lucy’s silver waterfall hair tilts when she moves. The tiny peace badge on her jumper glints. She leans like a rusty hinge to stroke the cat, book forgotten. Elegant fingers smooth the purring animal. She always wears gloves when gardening, and marinates in moisturiser every night. Like Cleopatra, she wishes she could bathe in milk. She knows she looks good for her age, but still bristles against seeming ‘invisible’ to anyone under thirty. She can remember …

Me Monday: The big reveal, for our one year anniversary

So, regular folk round here know I’ve been dating ‘H’ for a while, with both of us shuttling back and forth between Melbourne and home (near Byron Bay, Australia) once a month. We chanced across each other online, then spent three months emailing or texting, plus exchanging stories and hand drawn comics; we never spoke on the phone. Finally, we met at noon outside Flinders St train station, an iconic Melbourne landmark. And the rest, as they say, ladies and gentlemen, is Herstory. If you’re really keen, you could revisit or explore these past posts: Episode 2: ‘Yes Lets’ Episode 4: Multiple choice Episode 8: Best thirty bucks I ever spent We’ve just had our one year anniversary, where we recreated our first date exactly, meeting at the train station, going for Japanese lunch, wandering the streets of downtown Melbourne, then returning to the dusty second hand bookshop where we had our first shy kiss. So cute. And we agreed it was time for the big reveal, so here we are, standing at Flinders twelve …

Remember our 3 Dwarves of relationship attachment? Meet the 4th: ‘Diffy’

I’m not a relationship guru by any means. Aged 51 now, and still never married, nor wanting to be. The longest relationship I’ve had is approx 3 years, with a whole bunch of quick romances and much solo time in the mix. But this last year has eased change into many of those old patterns like a soft new thread, specifically after reading Levine’s ‘Attached’, and ‘The Course of Love’ by Alain de Botton. Plus meeting ‘H’ too. (If you’re new round here, you probably need to read THIS to catch up). I’ve been studying relationship dynamics, specifically Attachment Theory, as it casts so much light into dark corners I’ve been hiding from since being a young girl, which I’m also exploring in therapy and other reading material. One of my favourite posts on bone&silver is The 3 Dwarves of Attachment: Grumpy, Stressy & Happy ; well worth reading to get you up to speed on our three main attachment styles (Avoidant/Anxious/Secure), with clues as to which one is yours. I believe I’ve done an honest job …

relationships, online dating, raising a teenager, over 50, positive ageing

Is it a pothole or cliff? Measuring the drama of your argument

Main Attachment styles: Anxious, Avoidant, Secure Most regular readers know I had a Bumpy time with ‘H’ on the last interstate visit, and you were all so supportive and encouraging, many thanks. Long distance relationships can be a challenge indeed. It took a lot of patience not to have an immediate, dramatic reaction myself, and now that we’re all snuggly and cute again [phew!], I’ve been reflecting on how it felt as it happened. As I previously wrote HERE on ‘Bread & butter vs death’, there is a biological reaction to that disagreement with your beloved. Once triggered, your attachment system will flood you with the stress hormones adrenaline and cortisol. It takes approximately 20 minutes for your body to process and dilute these chemicals to return to normal, (a little longer for men), so going for a walk or taking ‘time out’ is actually a fantastic idea. But what’s actually caused the triggering? In a nutshell, a serious argument is received as a threat to our safety. I’m not talking about the simple ‘bread & butter’ …

relationships, online dating, raising a teenager, over 50, positive ageing

Bumpy

I haven’t updated about my online dating romance in a while, as things have just been cruising along: month off/week on/daily texts/phone calls & Skype chats 3 times a week or so, all cute n cosy. Till ‘H’s latest visit this weekend. Hmmm, is ‘bumpy’ the right word? No one’s fault really; just two slightly stressed human beings, bringing their fears, their wounds, and their frailty to the fore. You all know I’ve got quite a lot going on: Mum over in the UK who’s health is in decline and in a bit of a crisis right now, plus general exhaustion at the shitty state of the world. ‘H’ packed a small suitcase for this trip with some of the stress of building a new house on a tight budget, and various other creative/financial challenges at home in Melbourne. We tried to set our 4-day table with care and kindness, but right from the airport pick up, we somehow disconnected. Oh dear. Add in a delayed flight, driving home in the dark, missing dinner etc, plus …

Blog tales for the Over 50s with positive ageing, dating & relationships

Planning with teenage son No.46 UPDATE

Did he have a party while I was away, like I worried HERE? I don’t believe he did. (And there was a small search for evidence, I admit). However, my bedroom door was open (I’d left it closed), and the bed was made (I’d left it stripped to air). Me: So what happened in my room? Him: Nothing Mum I swear! I’d never let anyone in there, that’s gross. But I was really tired from the party the night before at ‘B’s’ house, and I wanted a good sleep, so I got into your bed… I slept so well, and it smelt of you too… It was very cosy. Me *Can’t continue conversation- gone all soft and gooey*  

“Roses are red/Violets are blue/Online romance update:/I’m so glad that I met you”

Dearest H- I know you love these ‘Cinnamon Sweetie’ buns, dontcha? If I’d met you at a party somewhere, I’d have seen that you too wore a thin but effective layer of protection, like a brown paper bag. I’d have noticed it was fragile, yet also strong. I’d have wondered what hid inside. But now I know. Or rather, I’ve begun to discover. And thus we continue to unravel each other, past the thin edges, sometimes a bit burnt, or a little brittle. Circling round, through the spices and sugar, with the odd grain of salt. Spiralling closer, moving deeper in. Slowly but surely, just like a Snail likes. 1 more sleep; see you at the airport xx [The story so far: Met online. Emailed and sent comics & stories back and forth for 3 months Texted, but no phone calls (although we did send various selfies) Met outside Flinders St train station in Melbourne, Dec 21 Have been flying to see each other approx once a month ever since, for 5-6 days The longest gap …

The ‘rainbow bar’ comes from an Australian engineer; here’s a screenshot

In this crazy time of hurricanes, floods, and earthquakes, I just want to celebrate a little human caring. This is for all you fabulous Americans/Canadians/UKs/Kiwis etc etc who (after my previous post HERE) commented “I wish I had one of those!”: I’d sent that post in to ‘Discover’ on WordPress, not to get ‘Discovered’, but just to try and let WordPress know how impressed I was. I fast got this email back from the Editorial Team: “Hello GG, Thanks so much for sharing your kind words about the rainbow bar with us. One of our Australian engineers conceived this idea and put it together to be able to show WordPress.com and Automattic’s support for marriage equality. I posted your note and I know he’ll appreciate your support. As a Canadian, (where we’ve had marriage equality since 2005) I wholeheartedly hope Australia votes YES. Let love win! All the best…” And I’ve only had 2 negative comments, which I trashed, and removed as Followers of my blog. Love and let Love indeed ❤