adventures, love, personal
Comments 19

6 nights in a row, but who’s counting? Well me, obviously.

I love my space so much. On the fortnights that my son ’17’ is with his Dad, step-mum, and 2 little brothers, I LOVE having my home to myself. Sometimes I don’t wash up for 3 days, piling the dishes without shame on the counter top. I’ll write or read all day if I’m not working, and quite happily just have crackers & humous for dinner . Or else I’ll clear the chairs and rug out of the way, and have a wild 5Rhythms dance session in the kitchen/living room, to the amusement of the cat.

I particularly love my bed space. Not only do I sleep like a starfish, but a diagonal one at that. In summer, I love to dangle one heel off the mattress edge, sticking it out sideways into the cooler air. Sometimes I toss and turn, especially now that I’m a bit ‘warm-flushy’ as I move through menopause, and will throw off the covers then re-burrow myself at erratic intervals.


Artist’s impression (thanks ‘H’)

And more than anything, I hate being woken up. By an alarm, by a noisy neighbour, by anxious thoughts, by a nagging bladder. Don’t even start me on the torture of someone who snores! Not being able to get back to sleep, knowing that I have to get up and function even though I’ve been awake from 3-5am is one of my slight-insomniac dreads…

So having a lover come to stay for more than a week, (because they live interstate so it has to be worthwhile), could be a challenge. Plus ‘H’ has similar solo living tendencies and habits to me…


It’s so E  A  S  Y .

In the past,  as a happily-Avoidant relationship type, which I’ve explained HERE in post ‘The 3 Dwarves of Attachment’, one of my practised boundaries was to not do sleepovers. I’d contentedly go home at the end of a date, or send them off into the dark night, without a qualm. Even the last boyfriend I lived with for 12 months 7 years ago never spent 6 nights in a row in my room (spare beds are there for a reason y’know, plus he was often away touring or teaching).

But ‘H’ and I have a wonderful groove going. After 5 nights at my house, we’ve taken a 4-hr road trip South, to a tiny music festival set in a mountain forest town, where I’m performing street theatre for a couple of days. We have a cute billet room with a very nice host, and some food vouchers as treats, plus full passes to every gig/show/performance. I love my world, getting paid to bring authentic theatre joy to people, and it’s so sweet to be able to include ‘H’ in it so easily.

Two more sleeps till the return trip to the airport and home for ‘H’… I’m going to savour every moment with Gratitude.


  1. “I particularly love my bed space”!!! Yes, this. One thing I will dread when “The Man” retires, lol! After many (well over 25) of him working nights and me having the bed to myself, I just can’t imagine that much “togetherness”, lol! Weekends can be hard….

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh my goodness, 25 years… I can’t even begin to imagine all that ‘sharing’! Especially of my bed 😳
      Thanks for commenting in solidarity 😘

      Liked by 1 person

  2. That’s fun to find someone that’s a fit. I’m going to read your blog on attachment theory. I find that stuff fascinating. I have been avoiding relationships since my divorce because I love my freedom -sometimes consciously, sometimes unconsciously. I want to get back in the game. How did you meet him?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Sharon, thanks for reading & commenting. Have you read the book ‘Attachment’? Order it now if you haven’t! Absolutely changed how I behave and react in relationships, whether with my son, my friends, or a lover. I met H online; I’ve been a big fan of online dating for years, especially OkCupid. Good luck! Gabrielle 😊


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