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‘I’ve got to get this done’: dealing with a parent’s dementia from afar

Wellbeing over 50 often involves caring for elderly parents

Catching the bus to the Mall July 2017 (the hats were unplanned) #motheranddaughter #ageing #dementia #over50

By the time this publishes, I will be en route to the UK. For 3 weeks, I am going to stay with my 82-yr old Mum, who is now suffering quite badly from her dementia. I’ve written about her before in ‘Two rocks lie heavy in my heart; the first is Mum’ . She was having two visits a day from social service carers; it went up to 3 or 4, and now it’s at the maximum of 5 visits.

What an incredible gift is a welfare system hey?

Some hard decisions need to be made, by family members who see her way more often than I, but it’s me who has the Power of Attorney over her financial affairs and wellbeing.

Mum knows I’m coming; she just can’t remember when. Usually I pop in for a few days, then head to France (Australia is a bloody long way from Europe after all), but this time I’m focusing solely on her. Having said that, I’m going to walk every day along the beach, join the gym for some Pilates classes/stress relief, and seek out some 5Rhythms dance classes too I hope- self care is going to be essential.

Some of the upcoming posts will no doubt be a bit sad, but I’m also going to do my best to try and find some humour… if possible.

Watch this space *inserts Hopeful Prayer Hands emojii

In gratitude for free health care and plane tickets with vegetarian meal options, G xO

 

29 Comments

  1. Hello Gg,
    Best wishes on your trip to help your Mum.
    I’m sure that you visiting her now will be best thing you can do. I hope she can enjoy your company.
    Love and strength to you.
    Shane

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks S- I got your birthday message and tried to call you back… yes, I am grateful to receive love and strength xx ❤ Thank you 😊

      Like

  2. I’m glad you are able to go and see your mom! I’m sorry that it had to be under such circumstances, though. I hope you’re able to make some choices that need to be made to help her live the best life she has! 💕

    Liked by 1 person

  3. All the best, keep strong. Our family is now watching brother deal with his 70 year old second wife who emigrated here and then did not take to us at all. I doubt we will be able to help him much, and he has had all sorts of hang ups about me being his older sister for years. i will be fine but I worry about other family members, how it will affect them. One case of dementia affects many people.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. My very best to you. It’s difficult to be the caretaker. You are fortunate to have universal care. It’s quite rough over here when full time nursing home care costs around 6500.00dollars a month. Out of reach for many.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yes, thank you VJ- I am really going to have to keep an eye on myself- I don’t know what to expect, and I also don’t know how families do it on a long term basis 😢

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Good luck. Am in similar situation…am POA for my father with dementia. Living close I deal with day to day, while rest of family lives overseas. It is a very difficult time, I know. You need to value every day with her

    Liked by 1 person

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