personal, Women
Published on June 26, 2023
Comments 39

How reading an article about over 50s women musicians changed my life

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Hello Folks, thanks for dropping by. Are you reading this post while sipping tea or coffee? That’s what I was doing when I read an article online which has changed my life dramatically in the last 12 months, and here it is: ArticleThatMayChangeYourLife.

My new Shero– who I’ve never met but hope to one day- Ruth Miller had a gem of an idea to start an over 50s punk band, especially for women who never had a chance to do that when they were younger (for whatever reasons).

YES. YES. YES PLEASE.

In 2021, using the name Unglamorous Music, she launched workshops to teach simple song writing and instrument playing to women around Leicester in England; now there are 8 all-female bands gigging round her local area, and they’ve just released a 12-song sampler you can buy HERE (vinyl, CD or digital).

As I’ve written in my previous post, the urge to start playing the drums came to me in a shaft of bright light from above, and that article about Ruth may have been the catalyst to knock the cap off my withheld desire.

I haven’t looked back. I only work part time, and live alone now since my son went travelling, so I can obsessively practice my triplets at 7am in bed if I want, or watch old drumming clips on YouTube instead of a movie. I can twirl my sticks while chatting on the phone, or tap rhythmically on the kitchen bench while waiting for the kettle to boil. My son ’23Now’ would arrive home after work to find me furiously banging away with headphones on, in a world of my own, so his sudden appearance in the living room would shock me.

Then I thought: “There must be other women round here who want to play instruments…”

With enthusiastic nerves and naive courage, I offered a free workshop in the local Women’s Festival, for International Women’s Day 8 March:

“If I get 4 women, we can form a band,” I mused…

The week before the workshop, my phone began to ring every day with a new enquiry; on the night in question, twenty women showed up.

I’d made a list of 3 things I knew we had to do:

  1. Beg/borrow/buy/hire our instrument of choice
  2. Commit to daily practice (even if only 10 mins)
  3. Plan our next get-together

All kinds of women and humans listened and shared their stories, including two 68-yr olds who’d been in bands in London in the 70s; a woman who was in a real punk band in the 80s; women who’d played guitars/flute/piano accordion/drums/bass/ukelele/keyboards, three singers, and one who brought an ancient rattle from Egypt who just wanted to get over her recent divorce.

YES. YES. YES PLEASE.

The two hours flew by, as I guided the group by instinct and luck, admitting I’d only been drumming for 3 months but was obsessed. We agreed to meet again in a fortnight, and that I would make a private Facebook group for us all.

I felt so honoured that these folk trusted me to nurture their musical dreams and desires; it made me even more determined to become a good drummer, so I could literally back them up.

And what happened next? Tune in next time 🙂

What instrument did you used to play? Are you inspired to pick it up again, or try a new one? Please tell!

With gratitude for music, G xO

39 Comments

  2. Maryanne's avatar
    Maryanne says

    WOW!! This is great! (And you look so cool with the drum stick in your mouth — I love your glasses and hair!)
    Though I have eclectic tastes in music, punk rock is always dear to me. My favorites – Generation X, The Sex Pistols, The Clash, The Professionals, the list goes on!
    I never had the desire to play an instrument, but I like to sing. During the pandemic, my musician husband and I made a “private” (those who have the link can see it) video of him playing guitar and both of us singing, “The Two of Us” by The Beatles. I changed the words to make it related to the pandemic. It was fun and I received many compliments. My husband had to lower his singing key, because I was shy and not quite ready to belt it out.
    Keep up the great work, you’re truly an inspiration! Punk in your 50s and older is the best because you have less inhibitions and while not led by the blind energy of youth, you have the “don’t give a crap” attitude that is essential for punk rock. Congratulations!!

    Liked by 3 people

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    • bone&silver's avatar
      bone&silver says

      Oh YES! Thanks for this comment, and your understanding Maryanne. And the compliments 🙂 You have utterly summed up the strength of our budding punk band attitudes, and we are writing songs about the menopause, the patriarchy, and unruly houseplants. I so appreciate your enthusiasm, and well done for singing; that is one skill or talent I absolutely do NOT have sadly.

      Liked by 2 people

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      • Maryanne's avatar
        Maryanne says

        I can’t wait to hear your music or see videos.
        I wrote a poem several months ago about being middle-aged and still being looked down upon by women who are even older! It was called “For Death She Ain’t Ready.” It was published in an online magazine. I poured my heart out in the poem and secretly wished I was in a band so I could really let loose with my emotions. I was watching Cramps videos yesterday and we forget how old Lux Interior was. So, if he could do it, why not a woman? I will live vicariously through your band. I can’t wait!! I am cheering you on! 🙂

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        • bone&silver's avatar
          bone&silver says

          You’re the best. You can be our #1 fan. Imagine if you DID ever make it over here and could sing with us? OMG I’d love it! We intend to have guest singers so more women get to be seen and heard, for that is our ultimate agenda 😀

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  3. Payton Bogatch's avatar
    Payton Bogatch says

    This fills my heart with happiness!
    A few months ago I was really angry and upset about being laid off of my photography job so I began a group and planned out a photography event. However, it was really difficult to find models with no connections and I kind of found being the sole leader overwhelming so I fell off of planning them. Luckily, I guess someone who came to my event really liked the idea and began another group with her friend so I decided it would probably be best if I was an attendant rather than the coordinator. Looking forward to going to my first event! I definitely connected with your passion and excitement to start everything up and I’m looking forward to hearing about your future events.

    Liked by 2 people

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    • bone&silver's avatar
      bone&silver says

      Thanks for reading and commenting Payton; yes, sometimes we can lead, and sometimes we need to accept following. As long as I’m having fun and joy, I’ll do either! Good luck with your own adventures, G

      Liked by 1 person

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  4. Wakinguponthewrongsideof's avatar
    LA says

    I played piano. While I liked playing, I haven’t had a desire to play again. But who knows…maybe next week I’ll pick up my daughters keyboard

    Liked by 1 person

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  6. acflory's avatar
    acflory says

    lol – I think your last post inspired me. I was editing a video for a friend, and I desperately want to clue people in to the fact that the story was inspired by the Phantom of the Opera. I was terrified of breaking any copyright laws so I opened up the old piano and picked out 5 chords that were vaguely reminiscent of the opening bar of the Overture. It took hours to find the chords – decades out of practice – and play them decently enough to record them on my phone. Now, those five chords are immortalised. lol And I’ve got this itch to play the Moonlight Sonata again. Damn you. :p~~~~

    Liked by 2 people

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  7. Deb's avatar
    Deb says

    I gravitated towards the choir in school, so my dream would be lead vocals in the band! I have to say though, as a teen throughout the 1970’s my current band would have to encompass disco, metal, glam rock…along with a bit of The Clash tossed in. I think what you’re doing, both for yourself and others, is amazing! You ROCK, literally 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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    • bone&silver's avatar
      bone&silver says

      Thanks Deb: we need you as our singer ! I too love a mix of punk/funk/disco… it’s hard to find the perfect song, & I can’t sing to save my life 🥴
      Thank you for reading, & for the appreciative comment- there’s even better stuff to come 😘

      Liked by 1 person

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    • bone&silver's avatar
      bone&silver says

      🤣🤣🤣. Yes, once you actually turn 50 (& goodness knows how we even got to 50 when I feel like 30 on the inside), I found myself thinking “It’s now or never.” So have a fab birthday, embrace the change, & just dive into this last amazing chapter of Life 🙏🏼💪🏿🙏🏼💪🏿❤️G xx

      Liked by 2 people

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  10. Ally Bean's avatar
    Ally Bean says

    This is exactly the sort of post I needed to read first thing this morning. I’m smiling and encouraged. Ever onward, eh? Oh, in answer to your question: I played the violin, & no I don’t want to play it again.

    Liked by 1 person

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    • bone&silver's avatar
      bone&silver says

      Delighted to have been of service 😃
      Yes, my Mum played violin as a child: hated it. But if you did ever pick up a guitar for example, I’m sure all that muscle memory would be helpful… 😘
      Thanks for reading & commenting Ally, G ☺️

      Liked by 1 person

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  12. thetotalfemme's avatar
    thetotalfemme says

    G, I fucking love this! You are the bomb. And I was just singing at a camping trip with the dykes who sing this song (all over 50 and rocking hard!). Rock on! xottf

    Liked by 1 person

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    • bone&silver's avatar
      bone&silver says

      LOVE LOVE LOVE IT. Thanks 🥰
      Yes, we are cool over 50s, some straight some queer, but all of us groovers 😎🤘🏿♥️

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  13. Midlife Dating Adventures's avatar
    Midlife Dating Adventures says

    Oh my god, I love this! Your concept, your post, the reaction! A m a z i n g. Well done you. Wish I could join you!

    I was in a band (of course!) in the late 80s, an electronica-new wave affair called Modesty Blaze. In my town we had a reputation and got radio airplay. We made it into the alternative charts (#3!). We 2 gals ran the band, wrote all the songs, bossed the boys around – and could barely play our keyboards. We never played live and yet recorded 6 songs. Revolutionary in those days, in Australia at least. I LOL about all this now but for a good long while, we wanted to break through in the UK, or at least in Oz. It all fell apart when I went to the UK for a year. Ah well. Memories. You go grrrl xx

    Liked by 1 person

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  14. Sarah's avatar
    Sarah says

    As one of the drummers for one of the 8 bands, it is joyous to read your story. Ruth has created a most profound ripple effect . Being in this band is the one greatest things I have done for myself full stop. At 50. I wish you all the best on your journey.

    Liked by 1 person

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    • bone&silver's avatar
      bone&silver says

      Thanks Sarah! OMGoodness YES, Ruth has changed my life too and I’ve never even met her. I agree 100%: taking up the drums at 56, then offering the workshop to other women has been the best move I’ve ever made except for having my son haha. Thanks for reading & commenting… perhaps we’ll all meet one day?! 🤩🥁 Love in rock, G

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  15. Aberdale Ramone's avatar
    Aberdale Ramone says

    I had never played an instrument until getting involved in Ruth’s Unglamorous workshops in January 2022, here in Leicester, UK. I am now the bass player in Glitch Magnet, the best post-punk esoteric noisecore band in the world. I don’t have a good concept of how old I am, but the band have an a average age of 50.

    Liked by 1 person

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    • bone&silver's avatar
      bone&silver says

      Hurray Hurray for Ruth! One of the most enthusiastic members of our group is our new bass player Cathy, who at 55 had never played an instrument either. Now she practices more than any of us! What a gift music & women over 50s is 🤩♥️ Thanks so much for reading & commenting; I love Glitch Magnet, what a name 🤘🏿😎 Love in post-punk delight, G ♥️

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