All posts tagged: gratitude

Oh how I hate learning lines! But it’s still the best job in the world

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This is a stressful week for me: we’re opening a new show on Friday morning. It’s our fourth version of it, and at last, it feels like we’re getting it right. I actually pulled out of it before we began, due to the stresses of dealing with my Mum, and concerns I may have to fly over to England right in the middle of rehearsals. But she’s getting two visits a day from the community nurse, and my brother is visiting her for 4 days tomorrow, so that feels sorted; the show’s director rang me the morning after I resigned to check that I really didn’t want to do it before she offered it to someone else. Which was very sweet. And smart. Plus exactly what I needed to hear. So I said yes again. I do make a really good Red. But that means I have to learn lines, WHICH I HATE. And to be honest, I’m not very good at it either; it also gets harder as you get older. *sigh. I’ve looked …

relationships, online dating, raising a teenager, over 50, positive ageing

Last weekend I was hit by a bird. Wallis Bird.

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Live music rocks I live in a small country town in regional Australia, with a huge number of artists and creative folk in its make up. Because we’re near Byron Bay, the most Easterly point of the mainland, a mecca for tourists and Australians alike, we have a lot of festivals all year round. I’m talking music festivals, food festivals, arts and crafts, healing and esoteric, dance, yoga, renewable energy, building design, crystals, antiques, comedy, more food, and of course more music . As a performer, I’m lucky enough to often get gigs at some of them, which usually means an ‘Access All Areas’ full pass, plus privileges like parking facilities for costume drop offs, and of course a fee. I’m a blessed and grateful woman. So I’ve seen a lot of music, a lot of performance, a lot of shows. I’ve been doing this work in this area for 20 years this year (although I won’t be getting a pension, nor any large Superannuation payout that’s for sure). I’ve shared backstage space with a …

relationships, online dating, raising a teenager, over 50, positive ageing

Last night I saved an echidna’s life

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I was driving home in the rain after dropping my son back to his Dad’s. Narrow country lanes with many twists and turns, up and down hills, with bush and forest on either side. I rounded a corner, and suddenly my headlights picked out an echidna crossing the road. Do you Americans and Poms know what that is? Like a hedgehog or porcupine on steroids: I slowed down, as it was just passing my left side of the road, on its way across the right. Then I saw the beams of another car coming round the corner towards me; it would hit the echidna directly! I didn’t hesitate. I slammed on the brakes, poked on my flashing hazard warning lights, and opened my door. The echidna must have seen the lights of the other car approaching, as it paused, then turned around and hurried back towards me, and the safety of the bush from where it had come. It looked like it was going to waddle under my car, so I stuck my foot out …

relationships, online dating, raising a teenager, over 50, positive ageing

Is it a pothole or cliff? Measuring the drama of your argument

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Main Attachment styles: Anxious, Avoidant, Secure Most regular readers know I had a Bumpy time with ‘H’ on the last interstate visit, and you were all so supportive and encouraging, many thanks. Long distance relationships can be a challenge indeed. It took a lot of patience not to have an immediate, dramatic reaction myself, and now that we’re all snuggly and cute again [phew!], I’ve been reflecting on how it felt as it happened. As I previously wrote HERE on ‘Bread & butter vs death’, there is a biological reaction to that disagreement with your beloved. Once triggered, your attachment system will flood you with the stress hormones adrenaline and cortisol. It takes approximately 20 minutes for your body to process and dilute these chemicals to return to normal, (a little longer for men), so going for a walk or taking ‘time out’ is actually a fantastic idea. But what’s actually caused the triggering? In a nutshell, a serious argument is received as a threat to our safety. I’m not talking about the simple ‘bread & butter’ …

Blog tales for the Over 50s with positive ageing, dating & relationships

Time management ideas: changing hats for 50 mins

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Are you time-poor? Trying to cram too many different projects into one day, like me? Dashing from school drop-off to supermarket to work to post office in lunch hour to work to dentist to home to sport to home to dance class to home to personal emails to social media to relax to bed? That makes me feel crazy… But what about all the time we spend staring at our computer or phone screens? A friend posted the other day that he deals with 100-1000 emails A DAY; that would feel like a pressure band round my skull. And have you seen the work of Eric Pickersgill? He photoshops out all the smartphones; you MUST check it out HERE. I don’t want to turn into a vacuous, staring monster, but I feel like I do sometimes. These are the subjects I regularly have to juggle when I’m in front of my computer at home, which I’m sure are similar to yours: Personal emails Work-related emails WordPress blog reading & commenting My own blog posts Answering …

Blog tales for the Over 50s with positive ageing, dating & relationships

400 Followers at last, so good. But why?

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I made it. I’ve been hovering at around 395 Followers for a couple of months, partly because I delete new suspicious ones. Do you ever? Why would a 30yr old Indian IT guy who’s never engaged with bone&silver suddenly follow me? Or a twenty-something Moroccan personal trainer? I’m not interested in fake. So anyone who follows me gets a curious drive-by, if I’ve never had any Likes or Comments before. [Whaddya mean I’m a control-freak? Shucks, thanks for the compliment]. Anyway, I wanna ask YOU why? Why do you read my posts? Which ones are your favourites? I mainly blog about a few topics: My hilarious & smart teenage son (short n sweet, I love these, especially as I don’t really have to do much) Relationships/Attachment theory/long distance romance updates (one of my best friends says she likes these the least, and just deletes the email. I still love her) GPMs: Generalised Personal Musings (politics/social commentary/introspection) Health/food/dance stuff Creative writing (I’ve not done so many of these lately but am hoping they’re going to return) Travel, …

How I climbed a small mountain, did something slightly ‘illegal’, & created the sacred

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I chewed my quinoa and baked veg salad looking up at her; in 2 hours from now, it would start. After 16 years of no access, 500 locals had registered for ‘The Chinny Charge’, a 7km run/walk up our tiny but omnipresent Mount Chincogan, near Byron Bay. The queue to collect our numbers was long, and you could feel the buzz of excitement; even Colin, who won the first ever Chinny Charge in 1967 with a time of 38 minutes and a $20 bar tab prize, was enthusiastic (in that utterly laid-back, short-phrased Australian country way) “Stick to the rules, so we can hopefully do it again next year: wear shoes, don’t litter, stick to the path, and no fighting.” [Fighting? I’m going to be struggling just to breathe aren’t I? What exactly went on in the olde days round here??] Yup, I’m happy to agree to all that. The tiny mountain is on private property, so unless the landowners give specific permission (which they do a few times a year to local  school groups), …

Mother and daughter out for a walk

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A hand strokes her back as they walk down the hill on this warm morning, heading away from me. Giving reassurance, or seeking it? The road is steep, and the frailer figure is definitely an old woman. Her back is stroked again, and I assume that’s her daughter, with the cherry red sunhat and white runners. Similar body shapes, similar height. I’m walking into a mall in England with Mum, July 2017, and we realize the shop she wants is up on the second floor. I know her anxiety and claustrophobia won’t let her get in a lift, and she hates escalators too. “Shall we walk up the stairs Mum? It’s not far. I can hold your arm, or you can hold the railing?” “Ooh, I don’t know, I hate heights. Will you help me?” “Yes of course. Just don’t look down. Let’s talk about something to keep your mind off the height, and definitely don’t look down OK?”  The red hat leans in to whisper something, and the older woman laughs; I hear it …

1 more sleep till we leap

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I’m so excited I can barely work, nor compose blog posts. But a dear reader just sent me a link to Elephant Journal, and this extract says it way better than I can right now: “We’ve all heard the quote, “Can’t live with them. Can’t live without them.” True love for me is the opposite of this saying. We know that we love someone when we can live with them and we can live without them. There’s something about love that overcomes distance and space…” “When we love, we feel an astounding sense of safety. We allow this person to challenge us, to help us give birth to the best version of ourselves. And this evokes a happiness that we can’t easily measure…  Love is a series of leaps of faith. We jump, knowing that not doing so will leave us with pain and regret. And with every leap, we trust that we will not fall.”   Safe travels H, and see you at the airport xxx