So yes, single again, healed again, ready to launch myself into the love trenches once more. I started online dating in 2009/10, and do consider myself a bit of a legend at it.
BUT, and this is a big but, why have other people not gotten better at it over these years?
What’s the matter with people?? Where are the simple manners, the initiative, the actual reading of the profile where it says “Don’t message me if you’re in America”?
I guess there’s always new folk finding themselves divorced or lonely, and heading online rather than to the now-defunct singles bar- does anyone over 50 actually go out anymore, cruising clubs?
Anyway, no matter who I’m messaging with, male/female/gender-fluid/non-committal etc, PLEASE follow these 3 simple rules:
- Actually read my profile- I spent ages getting it clear, concise, and appealing, plus articulating boundaries: no one from overseas, interstate, or currently looking for a serious monogamous relationship. Also, I don’t love sport, nor eating animals; no need to read between the lines there, JUST READ THE DAMN LINES.
- Respond promptly, and in kind– if I swing by a couple of times, and send a polite, friendly, interesting message, don’t wait a week then ask me ‘How ya doin’?’ Also, (and this almost deserves its own bullet point): CHECK YOUR SPELLING.
- Be courteous– it’s not that hard to say ‘thanks for your interest but no thanks,’ or after a week or two of messaging to decide that you’re not really feeling it, and to say the same thing, rather than merely disappearing… so childish.
Those of you who are online dating trojans (I’m looking at you Lauren [can’t believe I can’t link to your blog sorry], and Eve of Unleashing the Cougar, plus Dater Analysis) are no doubt utterly sick of experiencing the exact same problems, but I just remembered how annoying they are, so thought I’d add my two cents’ worth of complaining from Australia.
And all you connected/married/cohabiting folks, or happily-single, or just curious bystanders can now shake your wise heads at us foolish, dating demons, but I’m squaring my shoulders and going back into the fray: I will not be defeated.
Not with this new haircut thanks!
In gratitude for fast keyboard skills, a low tolerance for bad spelling, and a positive attitude, G xO